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Do I Owe My Adult Son Money If His Father Pays Me Back Child Support?

I met my son’s father when we were in high school. We were deeply in love, and nothing could come between us, not even our parents’ disdain for the relationship. We were inseparable and remained committed to each other even after he got locked up.

Upon his release after a short stint in jail, he promised to do better not only for me but also for our beautiful little boy. However, soon after his release, he disappeared, and we never heard from him consistently. Later, I learned that he had impregnated another woman and followed her to another state to help raise his other son.

Do I Owe My Adult Son Money If His Father Pays Me Back Child Support?
Stock photos of young man and older woman. (Photos: Getty Images)

Over the course of our son’s life, he may have seen him five or six times. Sadly, I went on to raise our son alone, making what I hoped were satisfactory excuses for why his father couldn’t see him. But once my son came of age, he saw through the lies. For his 21st birthday, all he wanted was to hear from his absent father, but to no avail.

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In fact, the day ended with my son and me getting into a heated argument about child support. I was on a call with my best friend discussing a hypothetical situation, and my son happened to overhear my conversation from the living room. Essentially, I was saying that if, for any reason, his father had to pay the child support arrears, I would pay off my house and invest most of the rest.

My son argued that if we were ever to get the money, it would be owed to him, not to me. I pointed out that I had been the one providing for him all these years in his father’s absence.

Am I wrong for thinking that I should be able to allocate the money to my son and spend the rest as I see fit?

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