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New Chris Brown Documentary Reveals He ‘Felt Like a F***ing Monster,’ Was Suicidal After Rihanna Assault

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Screenshot (Riveting Entertainment)

In a new trailer for Chris Brown’s upcoming documentary, “Welcome to My Life,” the R&B star opens up about his assault on then-girlfriend Rihanna.

The clip begins with Brown sitting down as musicians like Jamie Foxx and Usher praise his talent. A young Brown is then shown discussing his career dreams. It mostly focuses on the singer’s fight with Rihanna that bruised and bloodied her face.

Atlanta Black Star reports Brown beat Rihanna before the 2009 Grammy Awards in his Lamborghini. The pair would later get back together in 2012 — to Brown’s father’s disapproval — before finally breaking up in 2013.

The 26-year-old entertainer is teary-eyed as he recalls the confrontation.

“I felt like a f––––– monster,” he said in the trailer. “I was thinking about suicide and everything else. I wasn’t sleeping, I wasn’t eating. I just was getting high.”

Brown’s mother, Joyce Hawkins, said in the clip the day Brown hit Rihanna “was the worst day of my life and probably his life. I felt like I was going to lose my child.”

Since the incident, Brown has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. Today, Brown and Rihanna’s relationship isn’t close.

The Bajan singer told Vanity Fair in 2015 she “will care about him until the day I die. We’re not friends, but it’s not like we’re enemies. We don’t have much of a relationship now.”

That hasn’t stopped the exes from working on music together. Last year, Rihanna was featured on Brown’s “Before The Party” mixtape, on the song “Counterfeit,” according to HotNewHipHop.

Brown’s music is what has kept him in the public’s good graces. As the clip shows him flipping and dancing in high-energy performances, the star says people shouldn’t count him out.

“If there was ever a doubt in your mind that Chris Brown was done,” he says as the trailer ends. “He was finished? I wouldn’t bet on it.”

No release date was included in the trailer, but the documentary is produced by Riveting Entertainment and also features appearances by singer Mary J. Blige and actor/anchor Terrance J.

Watch the clip below.

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