It’s vital for mindful acts of emotional and spiritual intimacy to steadily develop as a daily practice for healthy sex. To that end, Center for Healthy Sex has created daily meditations to help you reach your sexual and relational potential.
Even momentarily concentrating on healthy solutions rewires psychological patterns to receive and share healthy sexual love in the present. Here are three meditations with the themes of free love, love addiction, and pillow talk for you to ponder and practice this week.
Meditation 1: Free Love
“High on a throne, with all the splendor and pomp his gold can command, man is yet poor and desolate, if love passes him by. And if it stays, the poorest hovel is radiant with warmth, with life and color. Thus love has the magic power to make of a beggar a king. Yes, love is free; it can dwell in no other atmosphere.” — Emma Goldman
The most recent “free love” movement, while echoing earlier ones, was energized by the 1960s social revolution and sought to separate the state from all matters related to marriage, sex, and birth control. Its salient point was that sex, sexuality, and love relationships should be entered into freely, without politics or the law governing our choices.
But when we talk about free love on an interpersonal level, we must examine the inner recesses of our intentions more closely. Consider that using love to enslave or to hold onto another is a sure indicator of low self-esteem. Trying to change someone so s/he fits your ideal, or coercing someone into staying with you — especially when you’re compromising your own integrity — signals that you’re not operating from a grounded place of self-love. Demanding constant, unquestioning validation from another human being can be the equivalent of holding him/her an emotional hostage. In truth, you don’t really want that person; instead, you want that person to fill in a missing part of yourself.
Take a moment to think about love as a freeing power. The adage, “If you love something, set it free,” is sound. When you surrender your demands for love, you will recognize that the only real love is free and, remarkably, will return to you exponentially. It takes courage to take your personal need out of the equation so you can give your love generously and without expectations. When you live in the reality of who you are and what you really want, you likewise honor your partner and all your other relationships. In this space of free love you, too, will be loved for who you are and not for any other reason.