While many people don’t have a problem with it, others think it is wrong for couples to have a wide difference in age. A big question on this topic is: what specific age difference is right or wrong? What is the standard and who sets it? If the couples are happy, why should it still bother anybody else? One of our writers, Michelle Joy Maxeyposted this question on her Facebook page: “Do you think it is taboo for couples to not be physiologically similar? AGE, ATTRACTIVENESS, HEIGHT?” Most of the responses didn’t see any problem with it. However, one post had a specific perspective: “well if you a ugly 80 year old 5’5 man dating a fine 21 year old 6’0 women….yes”!
Also in a Facebook post, another writer Sabella Abidde wrote: “How do you convince a 48-year old man to give up a promising relationship with a 24-year old girl? How? That’s my mission for the next couple of days. Not only is the age gap too wide, what can they have in common? I can’t imagine both of them having the same taste in books, politics, music, movies, and many other interests and pastimes. And while the man is close to his sexual peak, the woman is far from hers. Although I can imagine a 35 or 40-year old woman with a 50, 55 or 65 year-old-man – but a 24-year-old girl and a 48 year-old-man? Oh no! Pain, heartache and disappointment await both. It is almost like a born-again Christian wanting to get involved with a committed atheist…it will never work out…so why even try?”
One response to Abidde’s post above: “Best of Luck Big Cousin, That’s a Task NAVY SEALs would gladly avoid…..” Another response: “On a personal note I do not believe age has anything to do with love, it is the one thing that transcends all boundaries whatsoever and does not in most cases base its success on sexual interaction, the real bases of love when real is inherently rooted in mutual attraction, understanding, commitment and similar interests, that is why a lot of condemn criminals are getting married to those they fall in love with knowing they both would never physically meet each other for conjugal meetings whatsoever, these marriages are also said to be most times devoid of unfaithfulness and other vices that plague a lot of relationships enjoyed and practiced by free people, age in true love is nothing but a number but hey what do I know!”
Yet another response: “Question isn’t really that it wouldn’t work because of the age gap—that would be mere supposition/assumption. Rather the question is, is the 24 year old mature enough to withstand a relationship with a mature 48 year old? Or whether the 48 year old is immature as to find a lot in common with an immature 24 year old? Or they have just the right balance that will make their relationship work somehow. Leave the door to possibilities you haven’t entertained. Evidently they do see themselves as compatible—find out why before you tear them apart”.
So, who says what specific age difference is right or wrong?