The couple on a viral TikTok video in which viewers saw a woman turn down a first date because the man took her to The Cheesecake Factory appeared on a YouTube show to talk about what happened.
The two people on that date, Jay and Alicia, sat down with Kevin Wesley on “Kevin Wesley THE TRUTH FACTory” just days after a video of the pair drew millions of views for a first date that apparently went wrong.
The part of the video that many were drawn to was when Alicia wouldn’t get out of the car after Jay parked in front of The Cheesecake Factory.
“This is The Cheesecake Factory,” she said several times in the video.
“What’s wrong with that?” Jay asks.
“This is a chain restaurant. Who takes someone who looks like this to a chain restaurant?”‘ Alicia responds.
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Wesley caught up with the pair to break down Alicia’s expectations for the date as well as Jay’s response to her reaction. She told Wesley that she would get out of the car to go to the chain restaurant because “a queen doesn’t do that,” and she wanted to protect her image.
Before going on a date, Jay said he first met Alicia at a bar in Midtown Atlanta. When he saw her, he approached her and asked her out. Alicia said she wasn’t attracted to him on sight because she was so much taller than he is, but after talking with him, she said he was “thoughtful and engaging” and that she “liked his heart,” so she opted to give him a chance.
As for the date, Jay makes it known that the initial plan wasn’t to take her to The Cheesecake Factory. He was going to take her somewhere else, but the original plan fell through because she was so late. He told Wesley that he might not have put his best foot forward taking Alicia to a chain restaurant, but felt like the video paints him in a negative light and that she went too far recording him.
“[Women] kind of have this image of me based on the video, which hasn’t helped. It’s like they might think everything about me is reflected in that video, and I don’t think it is,” Jay said. “Her recording me did feel like that’s where she was trying to take advantage. It felt like at the time that [she was] trying to get a free meal from a fancy restaurant and then get content from me too to post on YouTube, Facebook.”
Alicia says that wasn’t the case. In fact, she felt like Jay didn’t see her value by taking her to The Cheesecake Factory, so she wanted to record a video of her experience for a few women’s groups she’s part of, whom she often addresses for opinions on dating matters.
“I felt like [he] didn’t see my value. In that moment, I felt like I needed the support of my viewers in that moment. I discuss relationships and things like that, so I thought that that was a good opportunity for me to have that conversation and see like what does everybody else think,” Alicia explained. “I wasn’t really taking [Jay’s] feelings into consideration, I wasn’t trying to be necessarily malicious or anything.”
Alicia also said she runs in circles with women who have a high standard of dating, but looking back at her date with Jay allowed her to see how her reactions weren’t helpful.
“To be fair, I was always raised that the man is supposed to cater to you. You’re courting me, so court me. That means wherever I want to go, you take me. Whatever I want, you buy me. That’s courting. I’m looking for a provider,” she said.
“But after the conversation, I could see how there was a lot of ‘I’ in that exchange. I was definitely very self-centered. I can appreciate if I do want someone to provide for me, I at least gotta be a little bit nice. I’m a beautiful woman, so I expect to be treated like royalty.”
She also noted how Black women are “tired of having to settle,” and she wants a “soft life,” but that she also has to be soft and not “combative” to receive that kind of lifestyle.
Both confirmed they haven’t gone on a second date, but Kevin Wesley said that the show would treat them to another first date and check back in with them to see how they fared going out together again. The couple didn’t necessarily say they accepted, but they seemed open and excited when offered.
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