My Boyfriend Is a Germaphobe, and It’s Starting to Rub Me the Wrong Way

Cleanliness is next to godliness, is how the old saying goes. Well, my boyfriend takes it to a whole other level when it comes to keeping things clean. We’ve been dating for about three months, and I noticed in the very beginning that he was kind of funny about certain things — but I didn’t give it much thought.

As time has marched on and I’ve been spending more time at his place, I’m noticing more and more that he has an actual problem when it comes to germs and cleaning up. First and foremost, he has an ‘intimacy room’ that is separate from his actual bedroom. We are only allowed to be intimate in the intimacy room because he cleans it straight away after intimacy is over. Talk about a mood killer? Ugh. And the reason we are at his house so much is because mine is just not even close to being up to his standards, which makes me feel terrible.

My Boyfriend Is a Germaphobe, and It's Starting to Rub Me the Wrong Way
Stock photo of man washing face. (Photo:

When he visited me, he did a tour of the house, literally picking my place apart and providing me with a list of how I could improve my living space. I’ll admit that his home is much cleaner than mine, but at what cost? I hate being micromanaged down to him hovering over me when I’m washing my hands to make sure I’m getting under my nails. It’s hard not to take his OCD behaviors personally, but he is adamant about the fact that he’s like this with everyone.

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The last straw was when I had a bump near my lip, and he refused to kiss me. He wanted me to go to the doctor to get a herpes screening, and I refused. It was a pimple for crying out loud! I have told him that his practices are starting to get to me and that he needs to back off. He claims that he will calm it down but hasn’t yet.

Should I suggest counseling for his unacceptable behavior or break things off with my clean freak?

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