Former New York Mayor Bill de Blasio and his wife Chirlane McCray are in the middle of a separation but say they are “still very much in love” and do not plan to divorce.
The two announced their separation on Wednesday, July 5, and said that they hope to be a model couple for those changing from a traditional example of marriage.
“This is a big change for us, but Bill and I are still very much in love. We came to this decision together, and I think it’s the right decision for us,” McCray, 68, told reporters.
The couple married in 1994 and, from their union had two biracial children, Dante and Chiara de Blasio.
Speculation about their marriage started during de Blasio’s presidential campaign when he shared that his wife was a self-identified lesbian.
“For the guy who took the chance on a woman who was an out lesbian … there was a part of me that would at times say, ‘Hmmm, is this like a time bomb ticking? Is this something that you’re going to regret later on?’ So I always lived with that stuff,” de Blasio said in an interview with The New York Times.
The couple says they experienced rough patches during his 2020 presidential run and seven years as mayor of New York City. The challenges of their marriage became amplified, specifically during the COVID-19 crisis, when the mayor says he became “very needy” emotionally.
For McCray, the weight of being his wife at that time became draining.
But by redefining their connection, the two dare to present more options than being married, divorced, or separated from the world.
“I hope that we can be a model for how couples can communicate honestly about what their needs are and how to conduct themselves when they find it’s a time to move in a different direction,” McCray said.
Despite the changes in their lives, she says she and the former mayor have “a very deep bond between” each other, adding that all they built over the past 32 years “doesn’t just go away.”
The couple told The New York Times they plan to stay married and continue sharing their Brooklyn home while dating other people.
“It’s one thing to make a decision, it’s another thing to think … figuring out how it plays out and we will be talking about that over the next months,” McCray said.
The couple’s announcement got several reactions on social media.
“De Blasio basically just got an entire NYT article to announce he’s going poly and I’m so over Eric Adams that I read this with fondness,” wrote one Twitter user.
“Too expensive to divorce #cheaperToKeepHer,” wrote another user.
“One of them is probably already in a relationship and is getting in front of stories about it to make it seem like they’re not cheating,” another online user speculated. “They weren’t able to reach a resolution on the home before they had to make the announcement is my guess.”
