From the outside looking in, it appears that Janelle Monáe has it all. A music career filled with critical and commercial success, plus, a soaring film career. But according to the 32-year-old, there’s one thing she may never have, at least based on her fears.
“That I won’t have a family within the time frame that I want to have a family,” said Monáe in a recent interview. “I want to have children, but I don’t want to miss that time because I was so focused on my career, and because I didn’t plan accordingly. That scares me most now more than anything. I do want to usher in a new generation of babies that will be better than me and able to dream bigger than me and go out into this world and turn it upside down in a very positive way.”
While the Kansas City native has made it clear that she won’t put career over family, other famous women like Aisha Tyler have said the opposite. In fact, the actress and comedian said people shouldn’t feel guilty if they want to chase their own dreams and not have children.
“[Choosing] work over family [is] a completely valid choice, and no should ever feel embarrassed or regretful about that,” she told HuffPostLive in 2014.
Eve also talked about not having children for the time being and said it bothers her how people put pressure on her because of age.
“I am so sick about people making a big deal about women’s ages. They don’t do this to men,” she said last year. “My 39th birthday is next week. It’s in eight days, and the one question that I get is men and women ask me, ‘How old are you again? Oh, you don’t have any kids? How old are you again?’ And I’m like, ‘You heard me say how old I am.’”
Unlike Eve, Monáe didn’t say she received outside pressure about having children, but she did talk about putting pressure on herself. According to the “Moonlight” actress, she often tried to appear flawless for others, which took away her feelings of enjoyment.
“I’m a self-editor and perfectionist, and I don’t enjoy my experiences when I’m so focused on being consistently perfect in every situation,” said Monáe, who’s new album “Dirty Computer” drops on April 27. “It’s something that I’ve had to work on my entire life actively. It used to consume my experience, and I couldn’t enjoy things because I was so focused on how they were going to be presented.”
“I was so concerned with what people thought, but now I’m just at this point in my life where I’m finding strength in my imperfections,” she added. “And I realize that I connect more with myself and with other people when my faults are being shared for all to see.”