In a now-viral post on Reddit, a woman recounted why she called the police on her mother after she shaved off her biracial daughter’s curly hair.
The post, written on the r/AITAH board by user OrneryExchange8001, has since been removed from the platform’s moderators but received more than 17,000 upvotes after it was posted on September 8.
The Reddit user wrote about her 3-year-old biracial daughter, Zoe.
“Zoe is biracial – I’m white, and my husband Tyler is black,” she wrote, according to the New York Post. “Zoe has the most stunning curly hair, and I’ve always taken great care of it. She absolutely loves her curls, and we’ve made it a fun bonding activity to style her hair together.”
Unlike Zoe’s parents, the toddler’s grandmother wasn’t a fan of the 3-year-old’s hair, making disparaging comments like, “It looks so wild,” “That’s just too much hair for a little girl,” and “Wouldn’t it be easier if it were straight?”
Zoe’s mother said she always brushed the comments off as “harmless,” until one babysitting experience involving Zoe’s grandmother ended disastrously.
Zoe’s mom said she left the 3-year-old in her mother’s care for a few hours due to a work emergency a few weeks ago.
“When I came to pick Zoe up, I was horrified – Zoe’s gorgeous curls were completely gone,” Zoe’s mom wrote. “My mom cut my baby’s hair without my permission — she did a half a– job.”
Zoe’s head was “shaved bald.” When her mom asked the grandmother what happened, the grandmother “just shrugged and said, ‘I did her a favor. Now she looks tidy and presentable. Besides, it’ll grow back straight.’”
The toddler’s mother said she was “livid,” and on the verge of tears, adding that she felt her mother “had violated my daughter’s sense of self,” and “disrespected my boundaries as a parent.”
The incident prompted Zoe’s mom to call the police and report the haircut as assault.
“They actually came and took statements from both me and Mom, and she was brought in for questioning later. After that, my dad, who I’ve always loved and respected, called me and was furious,” Zoe’s mother wrote. “He said I’d gone too far, that mom was just trying to help, and that calling the police was a massive overreaction.”
Thousands of Reddit users sided with the toddler’s mother, expressing similar contempt and disgust for the grandmother’s actions and noting the racist implications surrounding the incident.
“This is horrifying,” another commenter added. “There is a long, racist history against black women wearing their hair naturally, I can’t help but think this somehow stems from that. Not to mention her ignorance in thinking her hair will ‘grow back straight’.
“NTA your mom assaulted your kid because she’s Black. This is a hate crime,” one person added.
“Her comments + inflicting bodily harm on a minor, feels more like a hate crime than a haircut,” another comment echoed.