I’ve been seeing someone exclusively for the past three months, and it’s been great so far. After my divorce became final six years ago, I took some time out for me to get acclimated to being single.
Initially, the pain was so raw that I couldn’t bear to look at another woman; I had no interest. But as time drew on, I began to yearn for human connection again, and sought it out. I work a minimum of 60-hour work weeks, so meeting someone organically in my day-to-day life would be highly unlikely.
I met my new girlfriend on a popular dating app. She’s a natural beauty and does the bare minimum to have to look the way she looks — or so I thought. After a few months of dating and being minimally intimate, we decided that we wanted to take things to the next level. I planned a romantic dinner at my woman’s favorite restaurant, and then we made plans to stay at a luxury hotel downtown in the city.
The night went off without a hitch, and we checked into our hotel around 8 p.m. Having been intimate with the same woman for close to 15 years, I was a little nervous about how it would be with a new person. Fortunately, it was seamless and felt very natural with my lady. We fell asleep in each other’s arms, and I woke up to a whole train wreck.
On her side of the bed, there was a huge padded bra, a wig, a padded butt, and eyelashes on the floor. I looked over at my girlfriend, but she was still asleep, and her head was buried under her arms in her pillow. I was legit afraid for her to reveal her actual natural look. She began to stir, and when she sat up and looked at me, I was mortified. I felt like I was looking at a completely different woman. Without the makeup and add-ons, she looked a lot less like my boo.
I’ve been on edge about the matter for the past week and don’t know how to tell her that I’m not attracted to her natural look but instead to the made-up version of her.
Am I being shallow and ignoring what’s most important, which is the person she is on the inside? Or is it fair to feel as though I’ve been hoodwinked, bamboozled and misled?
The Center gets to the heart of the lifestyle, parenting, relationships and finance conversations impacting the culture. Convene here to express and share personal and poignant points of view that arise in everyday life.
Send us your queries to [email protected] and let our readers offer some perspectives on how to navigate these conversations.