8 Insightful Suggestions on How to Talk to Black Children About Racism

Don't Be Afraid to Bring It Up When we avoid talking about racism to our children, we are not doing it to protect them, we are doing it to protect ourselves by avoiding things that make us uncomfortable. Do not let your children’s first taste of racism happen in the streets. Racists/white supremacists are killing our children every day, so the idea that talking about racism will “hurt Black children” makes absolutely no sense when you consider the consequences of them not understanding it. Be Honest About Racism/White Supremacy Never soften (or falsify) your discussions about racism/white supremacy with a lot of inane “color doesn’t matter” or “all people are the same” or “love is color-blind” or “some Blacks are racists, too” — or any of the confusing “politically correct” nonsense that means the speaker is not telling the truth about racism. The evidence speaks for itself. This requires the parent to have the best possible understanding of how racism/white supremacy works. Start with the Best Medium Many young people (and adults for that matter) are not interested in reading about Black history (although there are some exceptions), but they might be interested in watching a movie or video. Incentivize it by making it a TV/movie/pizza evening, where a discussion will take place before, during and/or after the movie. Look for Teaching Moments Watching and discussing recent news events can give children more insight into what they see in their world. They are likely seeing it with their own eyes and are talking about it with their friends, anyway. Trayvon Martin’s death, George Zimmerman’s acquittal and other high-profile incidents like the shooting of Mike Brown are good teaching opportunities. Talk About How the Entertainment Industry Perpetuates Racism It would be ideal to greatly reduce or eliminate TV, movies and pop music in your home, but this may be unrealistic for many people. Therefore, what we can do is at least monitor what children are watching and listening to and discuss the many ways that racism/white supremacy are being propagated through those media. For instance, talk honestly about why Black males are pressured to wear dresses in movies, why most successful Black female entertainers are light-skinned, wear weaves and blonde hair, why Black male actors are not shown loving or making love to Black females in movies and TV commercials and why Blacks are frequently depicted fussing, fighting, disrespecting and demeaning each other on popular TV shows. Talk About Your Own Experiences with Racism Your own personal experiences with racism can be effective teaching materials for your children to learn from. Tell them the truth about what you have experienced, how it damaged you, how it hurt you, and let them SEE that you survived it — and share whatever strategies you used to try to solve your problems. Stay Calm Also, it’s very important not to go ballistic, or go on a wild profanity-laced rant when speaking on the subject. Just let the facts speak for themselves. This will help them learn to control their emotions, stay level-headed and use logic when confronted with racism. Teach Your Children to Love Themselves and Their Race Recent studies centered around childhood development have found that African-American children specifically, who are reared with a proud, informed and sober perspective of race, are not only more emotionally secure than their “colorblind" counterparts, but also are more likely to experience increased academic success. Teach them that racism is not a reflection on Black people OR on our humanity; it’s a reflection on the inhumanity of the people who practice it. Black people were enslaved, but many did not accept mistreatment and stood up for themselves.

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