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'Walking Dead' Prompts Jared Gurman To Shoot His Girlfriend

A tagline has never been so true.

Aren’t the humans supposed to be on the same side in a zombie apocalypse? Well, AMC’s The Walking Dead has made it very clear that humans cannot be trusted post zombie takeover, and it seems the same goes for real life.

Jared Gurman’s Mugshot reports that Long Island’s Jared Gurman was arrested on the charge of attempted murder of his girlfriend, Jessica Gelderman, after the couple argued the legitimate possibility of a zombie apocalypse. The argument stemmed from  The Walking Dead’s pilot episode, when the main character, Rick, wakes up after a coma to find the world overrun by zombies. Gurman was adamant this sort of situation could actually occur and didn’t appreciate Gelderman ridiculing his opinions. So, to take out his frustration Gurman shot her in the back with a .22 caliber rifle. Jessica survived the attack with a pierced lung, pierced diaphragm  and shattered rib. She’s in stable condition, but her presumably now ex-boyfriend isn’t quite as stable.

At a conference on Tuesday, Gurman justified his argument, stating “There could be military mishap that would result in some sort of virus being released that could cause a terrible thing to happen.” Alright Gurman, we agree that you are entitled to your own opinion, but is it really worth shooting your girlfriend and going to jail over? Although, per The Walking Dead Season 3, a jail might be a safe haven in a zombie apocalypse. Perhaps Gurman was on to something…

My word of advice to Jared Gurman?  If you really believe in a military prompted zombie apocalypse, it sounds like it’d be pretty hard for you to get (and keep) anything resembling a girlfriend. In the future it might be wise to avoid shooting any girl with potential to be your boo or the relationship will be dead in the water. Or she’ll just be dead. Just something to consider when you get out of jail and back in the dating pool.

What people are saying

0 thoughts on “'Walking Dead' Prompts Jared Gurman To Shoot His Girlfriend

  1. Spanka says:

    What 8 year old wrote this? Learn to spell for gods sake

  2. TomFromPoland says:

    ‘What 8 year old wrote this? Learn to spell, for God’s sake.’

    In the next lesson, we will learn correct and proper usage of capitalisation and punctuation.

    For God’s sake, America, the British gave you one of the simplest languages on the face of the planet. Not withstanding, holding dominion over the free world, you still fail to express yourself correctly in the only language you speak. It never surprises me that you folks are quick to ‘correct,’ being no more right than the one you wish to correct. I think I’ll stay on this side of the Atlantic, thank-you very much!

  3. TinaG says:

    Dislike the title of this article. The Walking Dead didn’t prompt him to do anything, he did it all on his own.

  4. James G says:

    The Walking dead tv series had nothing to do with this idiot. By the looks of him I’m surprised she did not deflate when he shot her.

  5. J. G. says:

    The irony of your smug response is amusing.

  6. jim says:

    so…tom from poland…doesnt poland still owe us money? not to mention their asses from WW2? juuuuuust wonderin’. oh and as for the article, i question the female who hooks up with this “winner” and the line about him re-entering the dating pool? gives me chills. good luck out there folks!

  7. jim says:

    oh and as for the brits “giving” us the english language? no. we TOOK it. and their little chunk o land too. and by all means PLEASE …stay on that side of the atlantic.

  8. That’s hilarious. The expectation that we in America should have the proper use of the English language in hand. Are you serious? Or as one of my ex-girlfriends used to say “Is you serious?”

    Please believe and understand that most people in America cannot effectively spell or write proper English no matter what the education level. Read any blog, read any resume, watch any of these judge shows on television and you will find that America is full of illiterates. Black, white, Latino…there is no separation of the mediocrity of America when it comes to the proper use of the English language.

    Yes…best you stay on your side of the Atlantic. Skills here will clearly disappoint you.

  9. Thatdude says:


    BOTH sides of the argument here are ridiculous

    Why should we fight each other? Just as they want us to? Why continue to divide ourselves from each other based on countries? It’s the same as division based on color. Re-evaluate that.

    Divided we fall

    We are all the same.

  10. ChicagoRealist says:

    The English language was given to us by the British? Well, I suppose grammar and historical correctness do not go hand-in-hand. You do understand the ‘English’ language is a variation of Greek, ancient German, and ancient Latin? I suppose they gifted Britain with one of the most DIFFICULT languages known throughout history. See ‘Old English’ to help sort out your ignorance on the subject.

    Leave it to a Brit to ironically correct and criticize grammar using historically incorrect information. Also, punctuation while blogging, emailing, and/or any other form of informal communication is acceptable; however, using poor grammar through such mediums does leave itself open for ridicule from narcissistic self-perceived elitists. Considering the state of affairs in Europe, I would expect nothing less.


  11. Joe says:

    Funny how everyone is arguing with a guy from POLAND… lol. My fingers couldn’t possibly type all of the Polish jokes fast enough.

  12. Jacquie says:

    They should lock this guy up with the zombie-wanna-be lunatics who were arrested for trying to eat people…

  13. Nemo says:

    “Leave it to a Brit”…
    What part of his user name, TomFromPoland, makes you think he’s British?

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