While the definition of intimacy may vary depending on the relationship, it is generally felt to be the “authentic” connection between two people. As such, the connection reflects a mutuality of loving feelings shared and expressed in thought, affect and behavior. A host of factors including safety, trust, effective communication and sexual exclusivity have been [...]
Touch: The First Language of Love
March 15, 2013 | Posted by
Touch is the first sense we acquire and the secret weapon in many a successful relationship. Here’s how to regain fluency in your first language. You’re in a crowded subway car on a Tuesday morning, or perhaps on a city bus. Still-sleepy commuters, lulled by vibrations, remain hushed, yet silently broadcast their thoughts. A toddler [...]
Are We Losing Our Grasp of True Intimacy?
March 11, 2013 | Posted by
In our sentimental society infatuation has become a common path to the altar. Contemplate the testimony of one newly married groom who met his future wife at a New Year’s Eve party. He stayed up talking to her until dawn and became engaged three days later. After marrying a little more than a month later [...]
Trading ‘BACK RUBs’ Is Healthy for a Relationship
March 4, 2013 | Posted by
The best way to ensure a healthy marriage — or relationship — is to make sure you regularly trade back rubs. Not necessarily the physical kind — though those are great to give and receive too. No, what I’m talking about creates the foundation for a healthy, growing relationship. Because if your relationship isn’t growing, [...]
The Mystery of Why We Kiss
February 15, 2013 | Posted by
A recent visitor to my website, GreatSexAfter40.com, complained that her husband’s aversion to kissing was stressing their marriage. This is not the first time I’ve heard people complain about their lover’s poor kissing or unwillingness to kiss. But kissing is a frequently overlooked element of sexuality. Also known as smooching, necking, snogging, making out, lip locking, bussing (archaic), [...]
What Does ‘Feeling Loved’ Mean to Your Partner? Here’s How to Find Out
February 12, 2013 | Posted by
Valentine’s Day is approaching, and love is in the air. But did you know that love means different things to different people? When Don says, “I love you,” he may be thinking about how hot the sex is. When Marcia hears these words, she may think, “Wow! He’s committed to me.” In a dating relationship, it’s super important to unearth secret [...]
Why Do We Seek Sex?
February 6, 2013 | Posted by
Most sex happening right now around the world is not procreative. On the contrary, most of those getting busy at this moment would be shocked and upset to find that their joyful acrobatics have resulted in pregnancy. An intense interest in sex and eroticism is not necessarily linked to heightened interest in producing offspring. In [...]
Five Daily Rituals to Enhance Your Relationship
January 28, 2013 | Posted by
The everyday — filled with its supposedly inconsequential interactions and circumstances — is actually quite consequential when it comes to romantic relationships. That’s because relationships are cumulative, said Nikki Massey-Hastings, Psy.D., a psychotherapist who specializes in couples. “Each seemingly insignificant daily interaction with one’s partner builds upon the interactions from yesterday, last week, and last [...]
Changing Your Sexual Habits to Adjust to Your Partner’s Creates Better Relationships
January 26, 2013 | Posted by
Changing sexual habits for a partner can be mutually beneficial to your relationship, a recent study suggests. Specifically, researchers asked romantically-involved couples how often they made sexual changes for their partners – for example, had sex more frequently than personally desired or engaged in activities that were not their preference – and how they felt [...]
Sexual Fantasies Reveal Secrets of Real-Life Intimacy, Study Says
January 16, 2013 | Posted by
We spend much of our inner lives daydreaming, research shows. Given how central sexual fantasies are to fiction (can you say Fifty Shades of Grey?) it might surprise you to learn that very little of this research focuses on sexual fantasies. This may change in the wake of a fascinating investigation by Israeli psychologist Gurit [...]
