Duke Ihenacho, former NFL player and now life coach set social media on fire as he explained boundaries between friends.
While engaged in a conversation with his co-hosts of “Nice & Neat” Omar Bolden, an NFL colleague, and motivational speaker Jalon Webster, Ihenacho explained that he shouldn’t have to explicitly state that his girlfriend is a top priority.
According to Ihenacho, friends should inherently understand and respect this without the need for him to mention it.
“It should never be a debate. It should never be unclear,” he said in an excerpt from Ep. 77 “Your Friends Don’t Understand Your Growth.”
“Once I establish that this woman is my future, you know the deal. The reason I say that is because that’s the approach I take with someone else,” Ihenacho said.
He threw the conversation back in Webster’s lap and brought up Webster’s girlfriend, Brittany. Ihenacho contends that despite the two guys being friends for 10 years, he knows Brittany is “more important,” adding that he respects that she is his friend’s “future.”
Their followers on social media responded with a myriad of reactions.
Some applauded the men for having such a substantive conversation.
“It’s really refreshing to see men that GET IT,” one person wrote.
Another wrote, “I love this mutual understanding between mature men.”
“Really though,” another commenter wrote. “Who do you hope to be at your bedside on your last day… it’s gonna be your spouse.”
Not everyone agrees with the “Nice & Neat” podcasters.
According to the Alpha Male Mentality website, placing a priority always on your girlfriend will ruin your relationship with your friends and your partner.
“Whenever you sacrifice activities you had planned with your buddies because of your girlfriend, your relationship with them suffers,” the expert states. “It’s basic psychology – the less you spend time with someone, the further apart you grow.”
The expert’s logic says the girlfriend will then become the man’s only friend and then eventually he will be smothered by that responsibility.
Studies show most men “get more emotional satisfaction” out of kicking it with their boys than “romantic liaisons with women.”
For the hosts of the “Nice & Neat” podcast, culture did play a part in how they viewed their relationships, whether with their girlfriends or buddies.
Viewers noted how refreshing it was to hear Black men see the big picture, one that would not leave them alone in the long haul.
One person offered that the “Nice & Neat” guys were “having a marriage mindset before marriage,” particularly as they consistently went back to focusing on their “future.”
“Y’all are super in tune with yourselves and I love that the most! The high intelligence oozes out in how y’all communicate in this podcast,” one person wrote on YouTube. “My ears are always open.”
While many celebrated how easy this conversation was with the friends, others wondered if this same conversation would have been fruitful with women at the lead.
“Men are so simple,” one individual surmised. “Women will unfriend you prioritizing your literal husband over them.”
